if i were to make a list headed 'it sucks to be me' this little event would definitely be on it....

You will not believe what just happened to me. My life is an actual joke. So after waking up at 4:30am in my chair with a neckache. Having unsuccessfully attempted to go through P&P-18 for the fourth time. I decide to tidy my desk and perhaps call it a night. Then what happens?? (and seriously if you guess this- i'll be amazed and also rather confuzzled by how your mind works)

A giant wasp comes droning into my room- making the loudest BBZZZTT i have ever heard in my life. I glance upwards to come face to face with it- well it was less than a meter away from me.

That's right, A GIANT WASP. In December, at 5am, In. My. Room.. How did it even get in?? I was home all day, why didn't i hear this wasp? Plus, it's frickin winter- no windows are open in winter!!

So with my pulse thudding in my throat i drop my lecture notes on the floor, grab a folder as a defence and get the heck outta there.

Finding myself outside in the corridor, with a wasp dominating my room and branding me a banished outsider has definitely not been the highlight of my life. What do I do in this precaurious situation? I glance into my room- find the wasp sitting on my bed. I debate with myself over whether to just trap it in a glass, however upon seeing it's MASSIVE stinging behind i am quickly convinced that fetching dad is the best solution.

So waking my dad at 5am. I am 18 years old and at uni, should i not be able to handle insects? Answer- Hell to the No!!! Tackling killer wasps in my room at insane hours of the morning- has never been on my 'things i must do before i die' list.

Anyway- i anxiously stand in the corridor and listen to my dad battle the flying fiend. It is not an easy battle, it slips away many a times. It withstands about 10 whacks (no lie) and still manages to fly around. I watch in silent horror as it bumbles around in my room lamp, sending a massive shower of dust all over my desk, laptop and notes. In this moment i decide i hate insects. That's right- HATE. Pure unadulterated loathing.

My dad has it trapped between two slippers. He is squeezing them together- but no, its seemingly invinsible armour is still holding it together. And it thrashes around. Never have i desired an AK-47 more than at this particular moment. Anyhow- it presently lies in several pieces (that's right i shall be grotesque and Sweeney Todd like) and dismantled in our toilet bin. May it not rest in peace.

I have vowed to myself NEVER to leave my bedroom door open again. Ever ever ever....And i am sitting here, breathing in the dust that is now circulating in the air (my eyes are irritated, my trachea is irritated) and I am feeling very sorry for myself.


Wasps were definitely harmed in the making of this post.